I Have Something To Say

Conversations with narcissists often start out like this. You make a statement about something that matters to you. It doesn't matter what it is exactly, but the fact that it holds some meaning or significance to you is what the narc hones in on. The narc then demeans the thing you care about, through either dismissing it or making excuses why it doesn't matter. Then they make some unrelated accusation that accuses you of the opposite of your actions and intentions.  Next, they twist what you said to make you wrong, and accuse you of they very thing they are blatantly doing. Fun, huh? Let's take a look at an example of this. You say you love kittens, and hope to foster them someday. Not too controversial, right? Just a statement about something you care about. A narcissist says kittens are stupid, and there's too many of them anyway. Then they tell you you're just encouraging all those losers that don't neuter their pets. You're probably going out there...

You know what really pisses me off? Trolls. Trolls are abusers who hide behind computer screens and tear people down. They lurk in the comments sections, ready to pounce, waiting for someone to point out their fallacies so they can attack. Ugh, I hate bullies. I really hate them. And I really hate watching them get away with it. In the past, when I saw a troll I would disengage and slip out of whatever dust cloud they were trying to stir up. As someone who has a low tolerance threshold for assholes, this was probably a good idea. But now that I've unlocked some of my anger, it's time to fight back. Of course, engaging in any kind of reasonable argument is futile and crazy-making. However, I decided that for one day, I'm going to indulge myself. For one day, I'm going to troll the trolls. Whenever some troll attacks or acts in an abusive way, I'll post memes about abuse. I'll attach the definitions for gaslighting and word salad. I'll poke holes in the...

Once you see the signs of abuse, it's almost impossible to unsee them. I was recently party to a conversation between an abuser and someone confronting her intentionally vindictive behavior. The abuser simultaneously denied any wrongdoing, while also claiming she "forgot," because, you know, she's so busy and important, and also threw in a heaping dose of blame while calling everyone involved in the incident (except herself) liars. It was the all-you-can-eat buffet of word salad. Word salad is when an abuser attempts to deny, blame, and deflect responsibility away from their abusive behavior. It's a form of gaslighting and manipulation designed to throw you off course. It's when you ask someone a direct question and they give you a five minute rant not answering your question.  In other words, they are lying liars caught in their lie. It's also used in reference to schizophrenics launching into a tirade of nonsensical words. For narcissists, psychopa...